When I heard the news I felt nothing which is too bad I guess, I didn't cry, felt sad, or felt that something was missing.
Seeing her in the coffin, I felt sorry for her that I wasn't able to forgive her while she was alive. She was the grandmother that I prayed I could have had since my mother's mom died when I was only a year old but she distant herself to me- us, she loved us less (my siblings) unlike my other cousins, I guess she was never excited to see us as well while we were growing up.
When I was in my teenage years, I was so angry that I asked myself whether I will cry or not when the time comes that she will die and so now I have the answer, I didn't cry. No tear felt down my eye/s, nothing. No emotions, I want to be sad but I don't feel anything. Honestly, I am praying that I could forgive her and let it all go with her.
I promise to myself that when the time comes that I'll be a grand parent I swear to the heavens above that I will love my grandchild more than I have loved my child/children.
